Antique Daddy, Outsmarted

Turned In By A Toddler

Be warned. Your kid will rat you out. Even if they can’t talk, they will tell on you.

After an especially challenging day last week, Antique Daddy offered to make my daily trip to Wal-Mart for me – and this is the good part – and take the boy with him! That’s right, I would be in the house ALL BY MYSELF for 30 whole minutes. I immediately started making a mental list of the fun things I could do while they were gone: 1) lay on the sofa and stare at the ceiling, 2) lay on the floor and stare at the ceiling, 3) sit. Oh what the heck, I decided to do all three .

When AD returned, he helped me get up off the floor and asked how is it that the Wal-Mart greeter knew Sean’s name, and more importantly how is it that Sean knows how to swipe a credit card through the card reader? I clarify that because I don’t want you to think my kid is stealing credit cards.

Furthermore, he continued, Sean easily identified the golden arches as they passed them – which, he added, is odd given your vow to never contaminate your child’s precious body with any food that starts with Mc. I shrugged my shoulders and said, “Kids! Who knows?” And that’s when he produced the collection of happy meal toys that were stuffed under the car seat. I was busted.

That is the thanks I get for all those lunch and shopping dates. Never trust a toddler.

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