Mildly Amusing, Use Your Words

The Chicken Wipes Mystery

Sean’s language skills are progressing rapidly. Even just four months ago, on his second birthday, he was only saying only a few words and phrases that we understood. The first phrase that he used that we understood was “I need that.” That phrase we understood because he said that about everything he saw about 1,000 times a day. Apparently, two-year-olds need a lot of stuff.

However… there is a particular phrase that he uses and I still have no idea what it means, and it is this: “I do see chicken wipes.” Chicken wipes? One thing I’ve learned about toddlers learning to speak is that, like everyone else, they need acknowledgement. If you don’t let them know that they have been heard, they will continue to repeat “I do see chicken wipes” louder and longer and higher until you hope a chicken will come along and peck out your eardrums. To prevent such a scenario, I try to mirror back to him what he says so that he might move on to another equally esoteric topic. When chicken wipes come up, the conversation usually goes like this:

Sean: I do see chicken wipes.
AM: You do see chicken wipes?
Sean: (shaking his head like I’m the dumbest woman on the earth) No Mommy! I DO SEE chicken wipes!
AM: Ohhh, okay. You DO SEE chicken wipes. Is that what you said?
Sean: (sighing and giving up) Yeah.
AM: Really, that’s what you said?
Sean: No.

There’s a free box of chicken wipes for anyone out there who can translate “I do see chicken wipes” into English.

* * *


2 thoughts on “The Chicken Wipes Mystery

  1. As I read this entry for the second time, I think I may have solved the mystery. Could it be he is saying Kitchen Wipes? They all know what wipes are as we have cleaned them from head to toe with them since they were born. They do see us using them in the kitchen.

    You see, I am an Antique Mommy, too. My angle was also asking for something I had no idea what he was saying. It sounded like Oatmeal Breast. One day I finally took him to the store and asked him to please find the Oatmeal Breast. He looked at me like I was stupid. Shaking his head, he walked to the cereal aisle and quickly picked out instant oatmeal with Dinosaur eggs in it. He handed it to me, and immediately started singing the score to The Nightmare Before Christmas.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *