Use Your Words

You Wipe Up My Life

This morning Sean once again said, “I do see chicken wipes.” So again, I just had to ask him, “Did you say chicken wipes? What does that mean, chicken wipes?” And he looked at me like “Not again with the chicken wipes woman!” If he knew how to roll his eyes, he would have.

And then out of the blue, it came to me. It was a moment of supernatural clarity, similar to those I occasionally had when I was in school and taking an exam. The answer to a question that I absolutely did not know would just come to me, bonking me on the head, as though it had been dropped from the ceiling. Finally, chicken wipes made sense. Not perfect sense, but it made as much sense as anything a highly impressionable toddler whose mind is not burdened with context or logic comes up with.

Here then, the mystery of the chicken wipes is revealed to you, so that you may get on with your life:

Chicken wipes are strung on Chicken trees during the Chicken season. Although some people leave their chicken wipes up on their house all year. Merry Chicken everyone. Mystery solved.


post~script: Thanks to everyone who emailed me suggestions! Your ideas helped me obsess in the right direction long enough to come up with the answer!

1 thought on “You Wipe Up My Life

  1. I can so totally relate to the “Chicken Wipes” phenomenon. They spout out these announcements and/or questions with what they believe to be complete and utter clarity, and have zero patience for their clearly clueless parents trying to zero in on whatever it was that’s actually being said. My own, just in recent days, had been pointing out “Fire Stations” to me all over, including in the grocery store. I finally asked him to walk over and touch one of them so I knew what it was – a fire extinguisher.
    BTW — I love your posts. They are my daily must-read. I look upon your adventures with your son as sort of a view into the future with my own.

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