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  • Eight Years Ago Today

    October 24, 2006

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    Today I celebrate my 8th year of marriage to Antique Daddy. We have weathered a number of storms as all couples do – infertility, chronic illness and then my own cancer – but on the whole there have been far more ups than downs. I think I’m good to go for another eight.

    Yet even on the days when it’s good that I don’t own a cast iron skillet, there is an anchor that is so solid and heavy and deep that it keeps us steady even in the most turbulent of seas and that is our common faith in God.

    We met ten years ago through mutual friends. I was 36 and had been widowed for over two years. He was 39 and had been dating professionally for as many years – neither of us prime dating real estate. We had both had our boats rocked by life. I had lost a husband and he had lost his father at age 11 and then his brother when he was 18. It is in this deep dark place far below the surface where sunlight does not penetrate that for both of us, faith was born. Not in fullness, but in emptiness. Not in blissful blindness or in a dearth of intellect, but in seeking and searching. Not in a joyful hand waving hallelujah chorus, but in a sometimes silent, angry, knee-bruising wrestling with God and His church. Ours is a faith not so much inherited, but earned. It is faith that is at the core of our marriage. It is our faith that dismisses thoughts of walking away. It is our faith that keeps us focused on living beyond the moment and into the future.

    And now there is the boy. The boy who has made our marriage more challenging, more contentious, more frustrating, more joyful, more meaningful and more worth the effort. The boy who represents the miracle of life and faith made manifest. The boy who binds us ever more tightly.

    So today, we mark eight years into this partnership of marriage. We do not know what the years ahead hold for us nor do we much care — we know whose we are and what we are made of. We just pray that there are a lot more years to come.

    40 Comments »

    1. boomama says:

      Beautiful.

      Happy anniversary!

      October 24th, 2006 at 8:07 am

    2. Big Mama says:

      This is so beautiful. Happy Anniversary.

      October 24th, 2006 at 8:29 am

    3. Miriam Pauline (MiPa) says:

      Happy Anniversary! Blessings to you both.

      October 24th, 2006 at 8:53 am

    4. Kvetch says:

      How wonderful to know so much as true. Happy Anniversary.

      October 24th, 2006 at 9:23 am

    5. Owlhaven says:

      What a fun photo up top!! Happy anniversary!

      Mary, mom to many

      October 24th, 2006 at 9:35 am

    6. Blog_Antagonist says:

      Happy Anniversary! I, as a relative newcomer to the blogosphere, did not know your backstory. I can see why you hold faith so dear. I recently wrote a post about “bad apples”, but you are most definitely a “good apple”. You always give me a reason to look at faith in a positive light. So thank you. And here’s to not just 8, but 48 more for you and Antique Dad.

      October 24th, 2006 at 9:46 am

    7. Angela says:

      So lovely, thank you for sharing.
      Happy anniversary!

      October 24th, 2006 at 9:59 am

    8. Laurel Wreath says:

      Happy Anniversay! Here’s to many many many more years.

      October 24th, 2006 at 10:04 am

    9. Goslyn says:

      Happy anniversary! Here’s to many, many more.

      October 24th, 2006 at 10:41 am

    10. sheilah says:

      Happy anniversary. I love happy marriages.

      October 24th, 2006 at 10:44 am

    11. Terri says:

      Happy anniversary. May you live happily ever after.

      October 24th, 2006 at 11:18 am

    12. aggiejenn says:

      Blessings to you both today. What a beautiful story of faith and love you have!

      October 24th, 2006 at 11:23 am

    13. Susan says:

      Happy Anniversary! You’re all so blessed to have each other.

      October 24th, 2006 at 11:23 am

    14. Tawnya says:

      HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Sounds like an amazinh journey! Blessings for many more!

      October 24th, 2006 at 11:54 am

    15. Carola says:

      Congratulations on your 8-year journey, I wish you many many more!! Happy Anniversary!

      October 24th, 2006 at 12:14 pm

    16. Shannon @ Rocks in my Dryer says:

      Happy anniversary to you, my friend. What an amazing journey you share.

      October 24th, 2006 at 12:51 pm

    17. Marian says:

      What a well expressed tribute to your 8 years together. Happy anniversary, and many more to you.

      October 24th, 2006 at 1:17 pm

    18. Revka says:

      Happy anniversary! It is so true that there are times when it is faith that keeps us holding on. I pray you guys have many more happy years together.

      October 24th, 2006 at 1:37 pm

    19. Susan J. says:

      Happy eight years! I hope you have many more in future together. Beautiful tribute.

      October 24th, 2006 at 1:41 pm

    20. Lillian The Ponderer says:

      Congratulations on 8 years, may God bless you with many more together and grant you His strength to weather the good and the bad.

      October 24th, 2006 at 2:18 pm

    21. Rabbit says:

      What a beautiful tribute to the faith that holds you together. There is no better glue. 🙂 Happy anniversary and may God bless your faith with many more!

      October 24th, 2006 at 2:39 pm

    22. Lisa says:

      This post was beautiful. What a wonderful description of your journey into faith. Happy anniversary and may God bless you with many more to come.

      October 24th, 2006 at 2:53 pm

    23. Jen says:

      Wow….congrats my friend….that is amazing….you have come along way and that is something to be proud of.

      October 24th, 2006 at 2:56 pm

    24. Mrs X says:

      Happy Anniversary and here’s to many more years!

      October 24th, 2006 at 3:00 pm

    25. lena says:

      What a beautiful touching post. Happy anniversary!

      October 24th, 2006 at 5:00 pm

    26. gracie says:

      Wonderful photograph and powerful testimony of love. You have much to celebrate…Congratulations!!!

      October 24th, 2006 at 7:02 pm

    27. Lela says:

      Happy Anniversary! I’m so thankful to have found your blog. Your writings touch me in so many ways. Thanks for sharing your story with us. Sometimes I laugh, sometimes I cry, and sometimes I feel hope after coming here. I pray that you and your husband make many more happy memories.

      October 24th, 2006 at 7:17 pm

    28. Linda says:

      Happy Anniversary. It sounds as though your faith was forged of very strong stuff. I pray you have many, many more years together and that your faith only continues to grow stronger.

      October 24th, 2006 at 7:48 pm

    29. Lynn says:

      Happy Anniversary and many, many more. The only way marriages can survive is with God by your side. And in your heart, and in all you do. It doesn’t make the road any easier but it helps to walk it with someone you love. But, you know all that.

      October 24th, 2006 at 9:55 pm

    30. zinda says:

      Well, shoot a monkey! I left a post yesterday (or thought I did – computer-challenged, you know!) But here’s basically what I expressed: how I had been on this ride with you, not experiencing it as you did, but watching life return to someone I hold so dear. During that hard, sad time, all I could do was hurt with and for you. What a delight it has been to see God’s hand in gifting you- first with Greg and then with that precious almost-three-year-old. God is good. Friendships are a blessing.

      October 25th, 2006 at 9:03 am

    31. kim says:

      There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t know that God gave me my husband even when I have the “wish I had a iron skillet moments. My faith was not born from ectasy either, but a continual searching,seeking, and striving.

      October 25th, 2006 at 10:19 am

    32. Damselfly says:

      Congratulations! Hope it only gets better and better with more and more blessings.

      October 25th, 2006 at 1:50 pm

    33. Blonde Chick says:

      Great post, and HAPPY DAY TO BOTH OF YOU!

      October 25th, 2006 at 3:57 pm

    34. Binky says:

      Congratulations on 8 years and best wishes for many, many more!

      October 25th, 2006 at 4:47 pm

    35. Tammy says:

      Loved this anniversary tribute. It’s so refreshing to hear how your mutual faith in God is the center anchor.
      Happy Anniversary!!!

      October 25th, 2006 at 10:53 pm

    36. kacey says:

      Fifty-three years ago today, I married the adorable man who still graces my Lazy-Boy and is the love of my life. We have had illnesses, but nothing to compare with your cancer. We have had sorrows (like losing two grandchildren), but nothing like losing a mate. We have been blessed with three children (all your age), eight grandkids and Christ centered lives. It just keeps getting better and better, AM. Eight years ago today, we snorkled The Great Barrier Reef in Australia as you were marrying. I pray for more time together for both our marriages. Congratulations!

      October 25th, 2006 at 11:27 pm

    37. edj says:

      Happy Anniversary! I love how your picture includes both toothpaste and White Linen–those are both important to a marriage, aren’t they? 😉 I so agree that faith is what comes out, and gets us out, of dark places.
      Here’s to many more years together for the 3 of you!

      October 26th, 2006 at 8:36 am

    38. Christina says:

      Congratulation. Thank God you found someone to love again and are blessed with Sean as part of the package. How sweet is that?

      October 27th, 2006 at 3:41 pm

    39. Erin says:

      That was so beautiful. I loved it! Thanks for sharing your heart.

      October 27th, 2006 at 9:12 pm

    40. Sarah's in the midst of it says:

      Wow, this is beautiful. My husband and I have experienced a serious boat-rocking recently, and we’ve discovered that there’s a new depth to our marriage that might’ve not been there without it. Happy anniversary:)

      October 28th, 2006 at 12:06 pm

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