Antique Embarrassment

Housekeeper Day

We have some workers come to our house occasionally. I don’t know why I’m telling you they are workers — they are housekeepers, but that just sounds so pretentious and there is nothing I hate more than pretension. At any rate, these ladies are good, trustworthy people and they do a good job. I kneel on my clean floor and worship at their feet. They help me keep my sanity and therefore I think they should be covered by insurance, but like Belgium chocolate or Pinot Grigio, they are not. And they should be. I should…

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Mildly Amusing

Because I’m Juvenile

This notice at the TopblogArea site: TopblogArea > parents We are currently recoding our toplist software which means some functions doesnt work, please bare with us. * * * * I’m sure the folks at Topblog Area are nice and all and they did ask nicely, but I think I’ll keep my clothes on just the same. I won’t even bother to mock the creative use of the word doesnt.

Antique Crazy

I Gave Birth, Where’s MY Cake?

Dear Me! Happy day of birth! Three years ago today you became a mother! No one prior to you had ever given birth before, you clever, verdant life-giving goddess you. Now it seems everyone is doing it. My how you have grown in these three short years, and I don’t mean just those few extra McPounds you’ve put on either. You have learned so many new things. In the past 36 months, that little boy has helped you learn how to relax the lower end of the old digestive tract and so there’s that, if nothing…

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Sometimes Sweet, Sometimes Tart

Thoughts On A Third Birthday Party

Photo Temporarily Unavailable Earlier in the week, I reminded Sean that his third birthday was coming up and I asked him what he would like for his birthday. “Oh, some party hats,” he said. “Is that all?” I asked. “Some balloons too would be nice,” he added. Oh that his desires might always be so simple. It won’t be long before the world will be too much with him, late and soon, as one of my favorite poets, Wordsworth wrote. So, we have party hats and balloons. And even a gift. As you can see from…

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Makes Me Sigh, Mildly Amusing

Someone’s Pants Are On Fire

The other day we were driving in the car and off in the distance, we saw a hang glider floating and bobbing across the sky. We pointed it out to Sean who craned his neck to see. “Oh! A hang gwider!” he said, “I used to do that!” Antique Daddy and I exchange glances. “Or really?” I say “Is that so?” “Sure!” “When did you hang glide?” “When I was at my farm. I would hang gwide and go way, way up in the sky and then come down – boom! – in the field and…

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Antique Childhood

Call Me Cupcake

I think every child needs someone in their life who thinks they are the cat’s pajamas — someone who, unlike their parents, is not obligated to love them. I think God made grandparents for just this reason. I grew up in an Italian neighborhood where Nana or Papa lived nearby and were always around to dote effusively on their grandkids. This became my ideal of what grandparents should be like. My own grandma, my only living grandparent, lived less than a mile away, yet we seldom saw her. When we did, her eyes did not sparkle…

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Parenting Gone Awry

Motherhood: The Fine Art of Deception

George Washington, the father of our country, is often quoted as having said, “I cannot tell a lie.” And that is why he is the father of our country and not the mother. Mothers lie. We have to. It’s a survival skill. Now, if you are reading this and saying to yourself, “I am always honest with my children,” you are in fact lying, at least to yourself. Who among us has not scarfed down the last Oreo while standing at the sink only to hear a tiny little voice from below ask, “Mommy where did…

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Makes Me Sigh, Snips And Snails, Sometimes Sweet

A Little Boy Like Me

Today Sean and I had a number of errands to run, which of course, included a trip to – you guessed it – Wal-Mart! But today, we did not go to our own personal Wal-Mart, the one that is one block away from our house, we went to the Wal-Mart that is one mile away. We are adventurous like that. This Wal-Mart has a McDonalds in it and in a moment of weakness, as we were leaving the store, I agreed to stop in for breakfast. Anytime there is a possibility that my son will ingest…

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Antique Crazy, Wal-Mart

Shamu Shops At Wal-Mart

I am loath to admit that much of my wardrobe comes from the Wal-Mart active wear department these days. It has come to that. Unthinkable for a gal who in her 20s once ate at the happy hour buffet for an entire month so that she could spend her entire grocery budget on a pair of Joan & David boots. The reason I end up buying so many of the things I wear at Wal-Mart is simple: I am there. Everyday I am there. I have a cart. I throw it in the cart. I take…

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Looking For My Box

Why is it that churches need to put people in boxes? When Jesus spoke to and fed the crowd of 5,000, did he organize them into Youth, Singles, Young Professionals, Young Marrieds, Young Families, Pacesetters and Widowed and Divorced? Photo Temporarily Unavailable When I was widowed at 34, I eventually (re)turned to church to help me through the grieving process – not so much for spiritual healing, although that too was certainly needed, but merely as a way to force myself to get out and interact with other humans on the longest and loneliest day of…

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