I nominated my friend and fellow antique mommy, Robbin at My Level of Awareness, for the March Perfect Post award for the honest and sobering post she wrote about the consequences and realities of delayed child bearing — A Bad Example is Sometimes the Best One.
I can’t begin to describe her post one pen stroke better than she wrote it, so I won’t even try. If you are waiting for the optimal time in your life to have a child or even a second child, then please — go, read and be warned.
To see the other March Perfect Post nominees or to nominate one yourself, please visit Petroville or Suburban Turmoil.
Beck says:
Something I read the other day was that women who have already had at least one children had MUCH higher fertility at 40 and 45 then women who had never had children.
April 2nd, 2007 at 7:12 am
Marian says:
This is such a needed reminder. In recent decades there has been a tidal wave of pressure in favor of being a successful career woman and living it up FIRST. As a 22 year old with some educational ability and already over a year out of college, I had many expectations upon me. I’d been accepted into law schools,for which I would need to go $60,000 into debt and then work it off s-l-o-w-l-y as I worked in juvenile advocacy, the lowest paying sector of law. Then I met my husband-to-be, and began to think more about the implications of that choice. I realized that, unless perhaps I waited until my late thirties to start having children, there was no way that I would ever be able to stay home with children. I chose to jump off of the path, with no plan B. It was not popular with parents, friends, or, especially culture at large. It has not been easy to have career women, upon hearing about my former jobs (which had low educational requirements)and my current profession of motherhood, not only look down their noses at me, but even make remarks implying pointedly that I am stupid. Still, I wouldn’t trade my four children and lack of luxury for the world… most days! Posts like this remind me that I’m not so stupid after all.
April 2nd, 2007 at 7:59 am
Stacey says:
Sounds like a good one… I’m gonna check it out next!
April 2nd, 2007 at 8:52 am
Karen says:
Incredible post. I had originally thought I would wait until my late thirties to have kids (my all-too-important-career, you know), but God had other plans and my family started at 27. Turned out that God knew that I would want two more, so His timing was just right, even if it did mess with my plans. I wouldn’t change a thing now.
April 2nd, 2007 at 9:06 am
GiBee says:
It was an excellent post. Thanks for pointing us in her direction, and as you, I couldn’t have said it better.
April 2nd, 2007 at 11:42 am
Cory says:
Thanks for the reminder. It was a great post, one which has left my stomach in a few knots.
At 30, I know I am not facing the end of the line yet, but I am starting to feel the pressure. Problem is, there is no way for God to make it happen “normally.” My boyfriend had 2 vasectomies. Yes, TWO. Not one iota of a chance there. Even on a reversal.
So, maybe I’ll give Him a chance with one round of AI – no drugs, nothing fancy, just a chance. If it works, great (YIKES!) If not, who knows what the future holds?
April 2nd, 2007 at 12:55 pm
Anjali says:
My latest blog entry is a review of Waiting for Daisy — a book that discusses this so eloquently.
I conceived readily at 27 and 30, had two healthy girls, and then late last year was shocked by two miscarriages. (One of which was the result of a chromosomal abnormality due to an “old” egg.) As I approach 34, an age that many people don’t seem to think is too old to conceive, I now have to wonder whether my ship has sailed after all.
April 2nd, 2007 at 1:57 pm
Lynn says:
I totally admire your motherhood journey. I guess until my own daughter suffered with infertility issues did I really understand. My generation it seemed either:
A.) Didn’t talk about it
B.) Didn’t know what to do about it
c.) Or just suffered in their own silence
You are an incredible mother who is enjoying motherhood’s…every second. Which as you know pass too fast. I am so glad that God chose you and AD to have Sean. I hope he knows how lucky he is. I bet he does.
April 2nd, 2007 at 4:38 pm
Becca says:
When I first read that post, I felt really sad and then kind of miffed. We just can’t second-guess where our life has taken us. If I had married early, I wouldn’t have met my DH and been the luckiest woman in the world. As you said in your last post, though:
All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. ~ Psalm 139:16
April 5th, 2007 at 11:30 am