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  • Pirates Need Groceries Too

    April 26, 2007

    Earlier this week, Sean and I were strolling into the grocery store from the parking lot when a pick up truck slowly passed us.

    We stopped and stood back and allowed the truck to turn in front of us into a parking space and come to a complete stop before we continued towards the store. Driving the truck, with the window rolled down, was a rough looking, weather worn construction worker kind of guy. He was wearing a red bandana do rag, had tattoos up and down his arms and wore a small silver hoop earring.

    “Look Mommy!” Sean loudly exclaimed. “A Pirate! Do you see the pirate!?”

    I tugged on Sean’s arm purposefully to try to shush him without being too obvious.

    Just then, the pirate gets out of his truck and Sean hollers to him, “Aaargh matee!”

    The big burley guy looked at us long and hard through slitted reptile eyes as I groped for my “Beam Me Up Scottie” button. And then he broke into a big smile and giggled like a little girl.

    I nervously giggled back in a “Kids say the darndest things” sort of way. Then I grabbed Sean’s hand and made a run for the store before he asked why the pirate only had one tooth.


    1. Jim says:

      A couple of weekends ago, we were on Lake Texoma on a Family outing. After boarding the boat, one of the first remarks from our 5 yr old Grandson was: “I am looking for a Pirate ship….If I see any bad Pirates, I will make them walk the plank”! Kids say the darndest things…(Ohhh for the memories)

      April 26th, 2007 at 2:26 am

    2. Jeana says:

      Now that is great!Yo ho ho.

      April 26th, 2007 at 6:06 am

    3. Beck says:

      Ah kids. They’re so life-endangerinly adorable…. Sean is funny!

      April 26th, 2007 at 6:55 am

    4. Jessica says:

      My nephew did the same thing at Wal-Mart. A man was also shopping at the store who had a patch over his eye and every time my nephew saw him he would say, “A Pirate! Argh!” Kids do say the darndest things!

      April 26th, 2007 at 7:00 am

    5. Lisa says:

      Whenever I need a laugh, I know I can depend on you. Priceless.

      April 26th, 2007 at 7:19 am

    6. Jess says:

      If it makes you feel better–my mother tells me the story of how we were waiting in line, ready to check out at the Piggly Wiggly one afternoon. I’m the little voyeur, sitting in the cart and staring at people. (I later became a photographer.)

      Apparently the woman in front of us had a rather large schnozz, and a large wart on the end to boot. You can predict what’s coming next:

      Me, pointing and loudly exclaiming, “MOMMY! That woman is a witch!”

      [shudder] I can only imagine the many ways I’ll be “paid back” with my future children’s audible inner monologues. šŸ™‚

      April 26th, 2007 at 7:45 am

    7. wordgirl says:

      We always used to persuade our youngest to brush better by warning him of the dangers of the dreaded “pirate teeth”. Little did I know it was a real phenomenon.

      April 26th, 2007 at 7:49 am

    8. Big Mama says:

      I love those moments when they make me wish I could crawl into a hole so as to avoid embarrassment.

      April 26th, 2007 at 7:58 am

    9. Hillarie says:

      Now we have never met and I have only seen your photo on your site but WOW- Sean looks just like you!

      April 26th, 2007 at 8:00 am

    10. Net says:

      Hilarious! My heart sinks every time I’m out with the littler ones and we are near an overly large woman. They will inevitably point and say, “Mommy, she has a baby in her belly.” I just want to slide under the cart! I always have to distract them with something like, “Oh let’s see what’s new in the cookie aisle!”

      April 26th, 2007 at 8:04 am

    11. mcewen says:

      Excellent! We’re into Pirates too [even before the film {translation = movie}] If he wants to know why he only has one tooth! It’s probably because he’s British.

      April 26th, 2007 at 8:19 am

    12. Lori - Queen of Dirty Laundry says:

      Love. It.

      April 26th, 2007 at 8:22 am

    13. Cathy says:

      That last sentence made me laugh out loud.

      April 26th, 2007 at 8:36 am

    14. Kara says:

      OMG that is hilarious! Kids just say the funniest things! My Toddler calls all older people “Mama” and “Papa” (grandma and grandpa). Luckily none of them have been offended yet lol, even if they are most definitely not grandma or grandpa age.

      April 26th, 2007 at 9:31 am

    15. Jodie says:

      HA! I love reading your blog šŸ™‚ I think every parent has had the “kids say the darndest things” moment . . . one of my many occurred a few weeks ago in Wal-mart.

      April 26th, 2007 at 10:26 am

    16. Southern Girl says:

      You never know — that might have just made that pirate’s whole day. šŸ˜‰

      April 26th, 2007 at 10:33 am

    17. Hol says:

      Thanks for the laugh, you made my day! šŸ™‚

      April 26th, 2007 at 11:23 am

    18. military mommy says:

      This made me hee-haw. And snort.

      I love that the guy could laugh. He’s a good sport and might have a few of his own wee pirates at home. šŸ™‚

      love, michelle

      April 26th, 2007 at 11:55 am

    19. Gretchen Hanna says:

      I believe a person’s sense of humor tells a lot about how they handle life. When my son was young, we had our share of I-wish-I-could-disappear moments, but looking back; there’s such a sweetness to them all that I can only smile in remembrance.

      April 26th, 2007 at 3:44 pm

    20. cce says:

      Isn’t it just so predictable. I can actually see their little brains working over something like this before blurting out their observation. I’ve found myself saying,”Kids, you don’t have to actually say everything you’re thinking.”

      April 26th, 2007 at 4:59 pm

    21. Tracey/RealEstateGirl says:

      that is funny! Pirates do need groceries too!

      Too bad he didn’t look like Captain Jack Sparrow!

      April 26th, 2007 at 6:03 pm

    22. Roxanne says:

      I think the pirate probably got a kick out of that and had a great story to share back at the construction site to boot.

      April 26th, 2007 at 11:14 pm

    23. Tracy says:

      Oh, Christmas time is the worst. Anytime my son sees a white haired man with a beard he’ll yell “Santa!”

      April 27th, 2007 at 8:17 am

    24. fully operational battle station says:

      Laughing out loud. Mainly because my husband wishes he was a Pirate everyday.

      Pirates… good stuff. Thanks for the story!


      April 27th, 2007 at 11:51 am

    25. kat says:

      We saw a rather lage woman in the library yesterday and, didn’t you know? My 2 year old said in a very loud voice, “Look a pirate!”
      I immediately thought of your post!

      May 4th, 2007 at 11:53 am

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