Reruns and Leftovers

One In A Million

Two years ago this month, I wrote my first blog entry.  The second I hit the publish button for the first time, I thought “I’m done, I have nothing more to say.” And yet, here I am, two years later.  I had no idea there was so much to say about poop and boogers. In honor of my two year Blogversary, I am rerunning my first ever post.  * * * I once saw a cross-stitched pillow in a craft booth store that read “Grandma’s Are Just Antique Mommys”. I am not a grandma. I am a 47-year-old mother…

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Hospitality & Manners, Mildly Amusing

Emily Post Never Wrote About This

As we were standing in line waiting for the train at the zoo this morning, I looked down to see Sean poking his index finger deeply into the fluffy behind of the grandmotherly lady who was standing in front of us, which was unfortunately, at his eye level and apparently just too much to resist. My eyes grew as big as saucers. Just then, she turned to see what was going on. Caught red handed, Sean immediately put his hands behind his back and put on his practiced expression of remorse. “Sean!” I admonished. “That is…

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Antique Crazy

Wherein I Talk Back To The Shampoo And Other Products

Leave on for three minutes. Yeah, right. I’ve got a three-year-old standing outside my shower. Lather, rinse and repeat.  Um, 3-year-old?  I’ll be doing good to rinse once. Apply nightly.  So what if it’s 8am. I promise you my skin does not know the difference between day cream and night cream. Apply over clean dry skin. One outta two is not bad. Apply Top Coat over color.   Sorry. Top Coat not within reach. Base coat will do. I live on the edge.  I take chances like that. Open This End. Must. Open Other end. Cannot. Stop. Self. (wrestling…

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Antique Crazy, Antique Daddy, Parenting Gone Awry

Playing With Fire

  So, lets say you are a fireman. Let’s also say that at around 6:45 am, you are roused out of your slumber by the smell of smoke. So you spring out of bed and you start putting out fires. Even before your first cup of coffee. At first, the fires are small and you can keep up. You kind of just step on them and smother them with your flip flop. But then, there are more and more little fires and you are river dancing on fires all over the place. And in between the little fires,…

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Faith, Mildly Amusing

Faith And Desperation Look Remarkably Similar

Today was one of those days when I just couldn’t seem to create any forward motion. I had plans to get things done, to get dressed, to brush my teeth, to move about in a productive manner.  But alas, it was nearly time for lunch and I had accomplished nothing more than a brisk 30-minute walk on the treadmill.  And I only got that done because I parked my child in front of the television. And that is about the time the doorbell rang. So, I jumped off the treadmill and hastily pulled on a tank top…

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Sometimes Sweet

When You’re Happy And You Know It

Antique Daddy has been in a bit of a blue funk for a few days, which is extremely rare for him.  That is one of the many things that I love about him — he is a ship on an even keel whereas I am a kayak easily given to spazzing out and flipping over and over and looking ridiculous.  After dinner we stood in the kitchen and I hugged him and asked him if he was still sad. Sean overheard this from across the room.  He stopped foraging through his box of Leggos and asked in a worried voice, “Daddy, are you…

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Hospitality & Manners

Good Manners

The other night, some friends had invited us over to their house to go swimming.  Sean was floating around on a little raft with the future Mrs. Sean while Antique Daddy and I stood nearby chatting up the grown ups.  I’m not sure what happened, but somehow he went overboard.   I saw him go in but I waited a split second to see what he would do – if he would try to swim to edge, if he would instinctively flap his way up to the surface and grab the side of the raft, if…

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Reruns and Leftovers

Something More About Mary

I’m working on a body of work right now that is taking more time than I anticipated, so today I leave you with my Ode To Mary Tyler Moore from last June, which by the way my friends Veronica Mitchell at Toddled Dredge and Mary Mom to Many at Owlhaven nominated for a Perfect Post.  Enjoy if you haven’t read it before, and if you have, then stop by Veronica’s and Mary’s instead and read their good stuff.  And don’t forget to show’em some love and leave a comment. Ode To Mary Tyler Moore I left the house feeling quite pleased with…

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Sometimes Sweet

Over The Rainbow

The afternoon sun breached the narrow space between the window and the window shade, allowing a sunbeam through. It cut through the glass coffee table and spilled its spectrum of colors into a puddle on the floor. And that’s where I found the little boy. Lying on the living room floor in a stream of iridescent sunshine. “What are you doing in here?” I asked. “Oh, just soaking up the rainbow,” he said matter-of-factly. Sometimes, this boy, he is too wise for his years and it makes my heart stop. The laundry could wait. I set…

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Antique Crazy, Mildly Amusing, Sometimes Tart

Wherein I Answer The Question: So, You’re A SAHM? What Do You Do All Day?

This morning I thought I would go to the grocery store and buy milk. We were out of milk. So I thought I would go to the store and get milk and that would be that. We would come home with our milk, eat cereal and then get on with our lives and find the cure for age spots or build a fort in the den out of blankets. Either one. So I mentioned to the little boy that we should get in the car and go buy some milk and if – IF! – he…

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