Last year, for Christmas, Sean wanted a Peemo boat. I searched high and low and consulted the internets and soothsayers, but nay – no Peemo boat was to be found in all the land. To this day we still have no idea what a Peemo boat is.
This year I wised up. I gave up on my powers of subtle discernment and the day after Thanksgiving, I just handed him the circulars from Toys R Us and Target and told him to circle what he wanted. He flipped through the pages indifferently. Nothing seemed right. Occasionally he would say something like, “Oh that’s nice” or “That might be okay” but there was no jumping up and down or hyperventilating as I would have done had my mother handed ME the ads and said circle what you want.
Then one day recently, we were in Sam’s Club and he saw the toy of his dreams. He gasped. He clutched his heart for dramatic effect. He hyperventilated. His bottom lip quivered as he pointed to a gigantic, hideous hunk of plastic in the form of a pirate boat and announced that that was it!! THAT! Was what he wanted for Christmas! And he jumped out of the cart and affixed his eyes to it like a Golden Retriever and he may have even panted and drooled.
I was relieved to know what he wanted and where I had to go to get it. I was not relieved at the thought of spending $70 for 4×4 hunk of plastic that would occupy substantial square footage in my den, especially since my den is not done in pirate or plastic.
So I spent the rest of the week scouring the internets for other kinds of less hideous, less large, less plastic, less expensive pirate boats — lesser pirate boats in all regard, pirate boats that would go better with my den, maybe a gay pirate boat done tastefully in warm woods tones and damasks.
I ultimately ended up with a Fisher-Price model that I found at Toys R Us for about $24. Yes, it is plastic and hideously colored, but small, not 4×4. And that was the end of my Christmas shopping, yay for me!
Later that week, I asked Sean what he wanted for Christmas, secretly looking forward to already knowing the answer, to knowing that I had already scored a pirate boat and that it was at that very moment stashed away in the garage awaiting his glee and delight.
He cocked his head and gave it a minute of consideration before reciting a lengthy list.
“I want a scooter, and some ice skates, a Lightening McQueen set, a whistle….”
“And a pirate boat? How about a pirate boat?”
“Um, no not really.”
“Really? I thought you wanted a pirate boat. You’ve been talking about a pirate boat.”
“Well, I changed my mind.”
I think Christmas is as good a time as any to learn about disappointment, don’t you?