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  • Snagged

    June 23, 2008

    When I started dating Antique Daddy, every time we had a date, I would run out and buy a new outfit.


    I wanted him to really really like me.  How could he possibly really really like me if I were wearing something he had seen me wearing before?  I wanted to look my best and wearing something new made me feel good and made me feel confident.


    As I got ready for the She Speaks conference in North Carolina, I of course wanted to buy a new outfit because I wanted everyone to really really like me. I wanted to look my best and feel confident.  Going to this conference was like going on a date with 550 women.  As I type these words, I am fully aware of how crazy that sounds but I also know, ladies, that you know of what I speak.


    The month before the conference, I went to my sister-in-law Annette who has a fabulous boutique filled with gorgeous things and she fixed me up with a nice business casual outfit — a Nic and Zoe crocheted sweater and matching pants.  The sweater was a splurge, but it was perfect for the conference because first and foremost, it was cute. Second, it’s always cold in the hotels but hot outside, so layering was a good choice. 


    For the month before the conference my expensive Nic and Zoe sweater hung in my closet and I gazed lovingly upon it. Sometimes I would even walk clear across the house to my closet just to look at it, like I was checking on sleeping baby.  I would imagine myself striding confidently around the Charlotte Embassy Suites where publishers and agents would throw themselves at my feet with book contracts  — because certainly anyone wearing a sweater as cute as that should be given a book contract.  That’s how it works in the world of publishing. I think that’s how it happened for J.K. Rowling.


    On the big day of the conference, I did wear the sweater and it was cute and it kept me warm in cold hotel.  But it snagged on everything but air.  It snagged on my purse, it snagged on my bag, it snagged on the clasps on my pants, it snagged on my folder and my ink pen.  I don’t know how many times I had to beg the poor soul sitting next to me to separate me and my sweater from whatever it had glommed onto.  By the end of the day, this sweater looked like something the lawn mower had spit out. 


    But I really didn’t care.  Although my sweater was frayed, my confidence was intact.  You see, I learned long ago that while I enjoy new and pretty things, sweaters and the other things of this world will sooner or later, ravel and fray, disappoint and fail.  Even people who not only really really like me but love me, will ultimately fail me — if for no other reason than that someday they will die.


    My confidence comes not from what I wear but from the knowledge of Whose I am.




    1. Amy Bayliss says:

      I’m sure you looked fabulous! I love the closing at the end. That really is all that matters.

      June 23rd, 2008 at 7:31 pm

    2. chickadee says:

      i bet you looked great. i wish i could have been there.

      June 23rd, 2008 at 7:58 pm

    3. chaotic joy says:

      Ah. I was hoping you were going where you went with this post. (That was quite ambiguous wasn’t it.) I guess what I meant was I loved the end of this post. And me too. At least that’s what I am striving for.

      June 23rd, 2008 at 7:58 pm

    4. boomama says:

      I love the end of this post, too, but I must confirm one critical piece of information: that sweater was fabulous. I thought about it many times today. The colors were perfection.

      June 23rd, 2008 at 8:47 pm

    5. chilihead says:

      Sorry, you lost me — you were in my neighborhood? Because I didn’t see you here. Therefore I must conclude you didn’t call me to let me know you were here. Which I know you wouldn’t do becuase you love me so. So…I’m confused and can’t process the rest of your post.

      June 23rd, 2008 at 9:46 pm

    6. Robinznest says:

      I was sitting beside you on one of those times you “snagged” on your purse. 🙂 But your sweater was lovely, the whole ensemble was. I’m sure nobody noticed but you.
      It was a pleasure to meet you!

      June 23rd, 2008 at 10:06 pm

    7. Sarah S. says:

      Because you know Whose you are, you are far more beautiful than a beautiful sweater (though I’m sure you were even more lovely in it pre-snagging). Thanks for letting us come along!

      June 23rd, 2008 at 10:13 pm

    8. threeundertwo says:

      Funny story. I can picture myself stealing glances in my closet like that. I’m sure it looked lovely anyway.

      June 23rd, 2008 at 10:44 pm

    9. Christy says:


      Have you ever posted about how you and AD met? Were you both His at the time?

      June 23rd, 2008 at 11:01 pm

    10. Dawn @ My Home Sweet Home says:

      I LOVED meeting you this weekend, and the sweater was lovely. There’s a picture of you in it and those fabulous shoes in my recap post!

      June 23rd, 2008 at 11:06 pm

    11. Renna says:

      What a wonderful post. I love the ending, and know you mean it. 🙂

      Now, I’m off to Dawn’s to see those fabulous shoes, and well, you in them, of course. 😉

      June 23rd, 2008 at 11:56 pm

    12. Sue says:

      This is proof that you are far more evolved than I, because my confidence totally comes from how dorky I feel, or not. Which of course sometimes has nothing at all to do with what I’m wearing.

      June 24th, 2008 at 2:35 am

    13. SCY says:

      So true!!

      June 24th, 2008 at 5:01 am

    14. Jo-Lynne says:

      LOL about dating 550 women!! I never put as much thought into my outfits as I do before a blogging function.

      And also. I noticed that outfit and that gorgeous sweater. I had just sat through a What Not To Wear session, and I remember thinking how perfect it was for you – the colors, the textures, everything. Gorgeous. Too bad it didn’t wear well.

      June 24th, 2008 at 9:45 am

    15. Kara Messner says:

      The conference sounds so amazing. I have been reading all you “girls'” posts about your trip and it sounds like so much fun. I am sure your speaking was wonderful and hopefully your sweater survived at least some of all that snagging! 🙂

      June 24th, 2008 at 10:45 am

    16. Jane says:

      Thanks for the reminder!

      June 24th, 2008 at 10:57 am

    17. zoom says:

      Isn’t that what we are all after?? Unfailing love that only God can give. That– and a fabulous sweater…

      June 24th, 2008 at 11:00 am

    18. Shalee says:

      Dawn’s right. That sweater was awesome! (And your hair looked really fabulous too. Bonus.)

      I’m so glad that you went AM. You’re so incredibly likable and fun that I can’t see why anyone wouldn’t love you on sight. I did, so I can only imagine these other fabulous women seeing the beauty in you that has nothing to do with what you’re wearing.

      Confidence looks really good on you. You wear it really well.

      June 24th, 2008 at 11:14 am

    19. Minnesotamom says:

      True, that.

      June 24th, 2008 at 11:57 am

    20. Roxanne says:

      I loved your post. I loved your wisdom. I loved your closing.

      And now, I MUST, MUST, MUST see that sweater.

      Thank you.

      June 24th, 2008 at 11:58 am

    21. Tom says:

      Amen. Everything in this world fails, but the Lord remains faithful forever. Jesus does not snag.

      June 24th, 2008 at 11:58 am

    22. Wendy Goldstein says:

      In the words of the infamous sailor man-

      I yam what I yam and that’s all what I yam!

      nice post

      June 24th, 2008 at 12:36 pm

    23. Joanna says:

      I bet it was cute. Even if it gave you lots of problems take comfort knowing it will die a thousand deaths in your sweater grave.

      June 24th, 2008 at 1:25 pm

    24. Robin says:

      “Going to the conference was like a date with 550 women.”

      Yes, I DO know that of which you speak. If I were the callin’ sort, I would have definitely called you the next day, or at least the next week;).

      Because you understood perfectly what I mean when I said I was a “Christian who blogs” not a “Christian blogger”.

      Once again, I loved your closing line.

      June 24th, 2008 at 1:26 pm

    25. Becoming Me says:

      beautiful post

      June 24th, 2008 at 2:46 pm

    26. Krista says:

      This story had me laughing out loud…and I’m at I know there are probably some people down the hall that are wondering what is happening in my office! I loved that sweater! I remember thinking that was such a cute outfit. I enjoyed meeting you and look forward to reading more of your funny and inspiring writing!


      June 24th, 2008 at 3:25 pm

    27. elaine @ peace for the journey says:

      I missed seeing the sweater, but not meeting the person! You were a delight and more beautiful than any clothing one could buy.

      So glad to make your acquaintance.

      peace for the journey`elaine

      June 24th, 2008 at 3:42 pm

    28. Amy says:

      And one of your books I’m looking forward to buying is a devotional book for moms. Simple, straightforward and wonderful to read yet so full thoughts that moms need so often to remember and ponder through their day.

      June 24th, 2008 at 4:56 pm

    29. carol ~ i throw like a girl says:

      It was great to meet you at She Speaks and I didn’t even notice any snags. I have to admit that I, too, put much thought into outfits, accessories, etc. But in the end, you are so right about the priorities, as usual!

      June 24th, 2008 at 6:47 pm

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