Parenting Gone Awry, Silliness

Are The Cookies Done Yet?

I thought I’d show y’all this picture of Sean when he was about a year old so that you might realize that letting him ride his bike on the front lawn without a helmet is not even close to the most questionable of my parenting practices.

And now you can say, “Well at least I never let my baby hang off the front of the oven!” and go away feeling better about your own parenting. I am here to serve. My gift to you.

* * * * *

Note: Creative cropping people, creative cropping. And, the oven is not ON because, Hello!? Safety first.

59 thoughts on “Are The Cookies Done Yet?

  1. Yeah, I would never let my kids ride bikes w/o helmets or hang off ovens. Crammed 8 people into a taxi careening across town two inches from huge buses without working brakes? That’s no problem!

  2. OH, He is so DARN cute. Isn’t that the sweetest age??
    And for the record…you dont even come close to quesionable parenting compared to when my three were growing up.
    Back in the 80’s I used to throw all of them and their friends in the back of the station wagon(in a pile) and take them to the pool, zoo, whatever…stuff them full of all sorts of junk food and they never knew what bike helmets or knee pads were.Plus they ran all over the neighborhood and sometimes I would not even be sure where they were.But I knew they were all together and that all the other moms were keeping an eye out too. They all survived.:)In fact, I think they had a blast!

  3. When I was 1, my mom found me sitting on top of the fridge. She never knew how I got there. Now I climb rocks in my free time. And my kids? They’re just like me. I thought I was going to have a heart attack the first time I saw my boy waving at me from the top branches of a tree in the back yard.

  4. That picture brings back painful memories of doing the flexed arm hang in PE class. ha-ha.

    Two of my kids are climbers. I found my daughter standing in the bathroom sink when she was 18 months old. She would climb up onto the toilet lid, then onto the tank, and then step across a 8-12″ gap onto the counter. Oh mercy. My 17 month old son is constantly found standing in the middle of our kitchen table. He’s fast too!

    So, do we get to see the original picture too? I’m curious!

  5. You just know one day Sean will come to you complaining that Mini-Sean is a crazy climber, and then you can pull out this photo and say something like, “Well. He comes by it quite honestly.”

    I was a sleepwalker. Apparently when I was very little my mom found me in the night chasing the cat with a knife. I don’t know if this story is true, but it’s a story my mom tells. I have a rather healthy relationship with cats. Not sure what happened.

  6. How long do you think it will be before this picture gets stolen and starts making the rounds in an email about horrible mothers and how could they POSSIBLY do this? And then it will be on snopes. And you will be an urban legend.

    I say about a week.

  7. Ha, that is some FANCY photo work!
    I once caught my 1 and a half year old on top of the fridge – she had pushed a chair over to a shelf, climbed ONTO A POT and reached the top of the fridge. GOOD GOLLY.

  8. Um, my kid has done that…with the oven on to try to get to the cookies that were already finished and sitting on top of the oven to cool…He stood on the drawer handle, and pulled up on the door handle…yes, the door opened, yes I was right there to grab him, and yes, I about had a heart attack!

  9. when Tan was 2 somehow he got to the top of the fridge…i have nevr figured out quite how, but…anyhow the way i found him was that i kept hearing a crackling noise in the middle of the night…
    i walked in the kitchen and turned on the light…there were fundraiser candy bar wrappers EVERYWHERE….the child was sitting on top of the fridge taking a bite or two out of each candy bar then throwing them down to the floor and moving on to his next favorite choice….
    I bought 30$ worth of the stupid candy bars
    steff

  10. But you really should have put shoes on him, because he could cut his foot and it could get infected and he could die.

    Also, not tucking his shirt in? SAFETY HAZARD. The shirt could get hung on something and he could trip and die.

    And put a hat on him because he could get hypothermia or someone could get distracted by the reflection in his head and trip and fall on him and he could die.

    And I’m assuming that shirt has small buttons? That could come off? And he could choke. And die.

  11. Also? I once knew someone who cropped their photos and they died. I don’t remember how, but THEY DID.

    Except I also knew someone who left three comments in a row on a blog, and they died. Dang it.

  12. Love it! Mine are climbers too. Now when the school calls to tell me they scaled the pillars by the front door and are all standing on the roof, I can show them this pic and say “but at least they didn’t do what Tina’s kid did!!!”

    And I have no one to blame but myself. I did it when I was young (fridge, table, trees, garage roof, you name it), and when I had my kids, I encouraged them. http://tinyurl.com/4g3m4x (scroll down to bottom)

  13. Gaaaaa!

    I’m laughing with everybody else, but there’s an edge of panic, because I too have a climber. Lately (at nearly five), he’s taken to scaling the outside of the jungle gym.

    I remember when my younger brother was little and climbed up to the top of the fridge. My mother was a bit flipped out, but my dad just said “I used to like it up there. It’s nice and warm. My mother didn’t mind.”

    I do believe in letting them stretch boundaries and risk injury, so I watch the kid climb and try to stay calm.

    That said, I went over the handlebars of my bike on our honeymoon (seventeen years ago) and while I had plenty of “road rash,” I was wearing a helmet, and I was able to stand up and walk away with all the brains I had before the crash. So I’m a bit of a helmet missionary.

  14. Sean is amazing so he probably COULD have done that, but your creative cropping is remarkable, none-the-less. We loved the bike riding sequence and the success story. I made sure my husband read Keary’s suggested method in case we have grandchildren to teach someday. Thanks for starting my day with a big smile!

  15. Yep, it will be a mircle if he grows up B U T he will and he will have good memories and be able to pass the insanity down. I think it is family glue.

    Yesterday’s post. my mother had a pair of SWISS sissors and a roll of scotch tape. They were NO NOs. One year dad ruined her sissors and HE bought her a pair of SWISS sissors for Christmas! I remember. Then as adults she taught us crossed and uncrossed. Wow I never knew you could do that with a pair of sissors!!!! If mom doesn’t know the game email me.

  16. Actually, I want to see the original, only because I can’t imagine how that could be creatively cropped. But I don’t know much about photography either. And I love the picture. And I don’t always put helmets on my kids either… shoot me now!

  17. my first thought wasn’t, what a horrible mommy! it was, that’s so cool! how did he get up there?!

    i think i might be raising a climber, too.

    so, how DID you crop that photo? i’m intrigued.

  18. That’s so funny- my baby’s getting to be a climber, too- he gets up on the couch at 9 mos! 🙂 I always use ‘creative cropping’ when there’s junk in the background or stuff on the floor. 🙂

  19. That is so funny!

    My one year old son was standing next to me one second and the next second I couldn’t find him. He climbed up the Volkswagon and was trying to stand all by himself on the roof! He’s 28 years old now and still climbs on everything.

  20. Oh, so cute! I should send you the picture I didn’t take out of the front window of our house when I heard the motorcycle going slowly up and down our street, and then it dawned on me that it sounded like my husbands, and why would he do that when he’s outside with our four-year-o…. omigod. And sure, I look outside, and he’s going slowly up and down the street on the motorcycle with our son tucked between his knees — wearing his bicycle helmet. (I had to make it thematic somehow, right?) Something tells me that wouldn’t have helped if something had gone wrong…. But it may be a fine contribution to the “parenting gone awry” photo collection. 🙂

  21. hahaha!! Do I detect a little judicious photoshopping there???

    (I figured you would get reamed for the no helmet photo…Tertia did too…some people just need to lighten up…)

    (I know, I know how important helmets are…and so does AM…)

  22. That baby boy is just as brilliant as his momma. As long as you were doing the PS magic, why didn’t you add the golden helmet? 😉 Jolly good, AM. My kids never wore helmets either — we didn’t have such things.

  23. Oh, Antique Mommy! I have been working on a project for the last couple of days and have not had my blog-reading time. What a joy to open your page and see this! Before I read your post I thought, “That’s my kind of fella! When food is involved, you’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do!”

    A joy, as always.

  24. Now I imagine you’ll have to use your mad Photoshopping skilz to make an entire album of Sean engaged in death-defying activities (though he may be a tad confused at not REMEMBERING any of these activities if he comes across it).

  25. AM, I think your parenting skills are just fine! When I look back at my own childhood, I’m amazed I lived to adult-hood, but good golly, do I have some really good memories. I’m glad I grew up when I did and not in todays “safety at all cost” society.

    Let Sean have fun, keep him from doing stuff too risky, but let him build good memories. 🙂

  26. You are hilarious, very gracious and a great mom too… I love the picture of Sean scaling your oven. When my daughter was also a year old she managed to climb onto the top rack of the dishwasher. The distressing thing is that I was in the kitchen with her, watching her (?) and never noticed until she called me. A couple years later she was on top of the refrigerator (seriously) helping herself to a piece of gum. I asked her to show me how she got up there as I didn’t see a chair nearby. She demonstrated that be grabbing the handles she was able to swing her feet into the ice dispenser cutout and pull herself up to a height that allowed her to reach the hinges… amazing!!! Climbing has proven to be her greatest skill.

  27. I was wondering about all the helmet comments too…My hubs thinks I am a huge micro-managing dork b’c I make our kids wear helmets. I say, as long as he knows his limits, let him learn. He’ll test the limits, and that’s a hard lesson to learn!

  28. For the record…You don’t even come close to questionable parenting compared to me… When I had my first child, a daughter 21 years ago I did everything by the book. After having seven more children, my youngest being 6 I have thrown out the book and adopted my own parenting style. My youngest is also a climber. I find him on top of the fridge, the SUV, in trees and scaling the railing on the front porch!!!

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