I like words and toying with words and the arrangement of words. So the other day, a friend of mine who knows I like words, asked me to help him polish his resume.
I always find resume writing to be a challenge because there is a fine line between detailing the many fabulous things you can do and how astonishing well you can do them and how the world has benefited from your existence — and coming off like a desperate, yet pompous delusional braggart.
I guess that is to say that on paper, humility is hard to pull off.
I started thinking about my own resume. I haven’t worked for anyone other than myself since 1987. If I had to write my own resume today, what would I put on it?
I am a super duper butt wiper.
I have been actively engaged in end user maintenance for five years.
I go to the grocery store every day.
As logistics manager, I oversee materials procurement and distribution.
I color with markers. A lot.
I am responsible for creative design.
Today I called the phone company about weird charges on the phone bill.
I lead a strategic technology management engagement with one of the largest cell phone service providers.
I call the GE guy when the washer breaks.
I oversee physical plant management to ensure uninterrupted client service.
I hand out gummy bears.
I manage the employee incentive program.
I spend a lot of time on Twitter.
I consult with other organizations on various management issues.
I have a blog.
I founded a publishing and communications empire.
I’m a mom.
I oversee human resources, including disciplinary action, budget, special requests, scheduling, maintenance and logistics.
I’m a mom. I can do anything. And if not, I can improvise.