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  • Age Before Beauty Backfires

    February 19, 2009

    Awhile back, Antique Daddy and I went out to dinner with my friend Jennifer and her husband to a fancy steak house.

    As I may have mentioned before, Jennifer is nearly 6-foot-tall, skinny, has long blonde hair, perfect nose, perfect teeth.  And if that weren’t bad enough,  she’s smart, kind-hearted and funny.  She used to be a pediatric ICU nurse caring for the sickest of the sick children before she retired to have her own children.   And she’s 14 years younger than me.  When we hang out,  I choose not to think about how I could have been her babysitter.

    Normally, people like Jennifer intimidate me.  Normally when I’m around someone like that I’m painfully aware of what a dork I am and I get all nervous and develop a spontaneous case of Tourettes.  But she’s so nice and totally unaware of herself.  Therefore, it is impossible to hate her. Trust me I have tried and I just can’t.  Even when I went swimming at her house and we were both in swimming suits, I tried to work up a little jealous resentment.  But no,  couldn’t muster a drop.

    Anyway, while the men folk parked the car, Jennifer and I made our way into the restaurant.  When our table was ready, I followed the host to the table and Jennifer walked behind me.  You know, the whole age before beauty thing.  Since it was a steak house, it was packed with tables of manly meat-eating business men.  And as we walked by, the heads, they were a’turnin’.

    My little ole wrinkled-y ego inflated mightily.  I tossed my hair back and did my best run way walk and tried to act like I didn’t notice all the stares.  Until I realized that nobody was looking at me.  They were looking right over my head.  At Jennifer.  Who was oblivious to the men who had nearly fallen out of their chairs to get a look at her.

    As I took my seat at the table, I fluffed out my napkin and put it in my lap and then I neatly folded up my pride and tucked it into my purse.

    Tonight Jennifer is taking me out to dinner for my birthday, which was awhile back. We will enjoy a nice meal prepared by someone else and cleaned up by someone else and we will enjoy girl talk interrupted only by the waiter asking if one of us would care for another glass of wine (answer: Yes! And bring the dessert menu too!)  I am SO looking forward to it.

    But this time, when the maitre d’ escorts us to our table, I shall insist that she go first.


    1. Tom says:

      Just remember, the only ones you really have to impress are already smitten with you.

      February 19th, 2009 at 9:34 am

    2. Nette says:

      I’ve seen your pics, and I don’t think there’s a manly, meat-eating business man (or any other man, for that matter) in our city that wouldn’t gawk at you, too.

      Oh stop! Really? Where do you live??? wink wink

      February 19th, 2009 at 10:22 am

    3. Shoe says:

      True friendship is a gift in itself.
      Happy Belated Birthday and many more!!!!

      Enjoy your girls nite out.
      Drink some wine for me! I like white zinfendel (Rhine).

      February 19th, 2009 at 10:39 am

    4. Lucy says:

      It’s very hard having a very pretty friend. When I used to go shopping with one, customer help appeared instantly. And I mean INSTANTLY. And she would milk it, too, while I was crammed back into a corner with all of humility hitting me in the face. That nice friend since moved to Oregon. I think I’m glad.

      I think it’s less hard when you are 14 years older. I delight in Jennifer’s beauty, inside and out, as an older sister or an aunt would. I would be so sad if she moved away. Her children and mine are like siblings.

      February 19th, 2009 at 10:39 am

    5. Janis says:

      Last night I KNEW, even though I walked ahead of them, that the guy at the pet store wasn’t opening the door for me! Along with his fellow employee, he couldn’t wait to get a look at my daughters. The service I (I mean WE) got was excellent and I’m sure employee of the month wasn’t on their minds. Sometimes it pays to have an old lady bring youth and beauty along.

      It is to be admired the grace in which you accept your friend’s beauty inside and out. Have a lovely birthday dinner.

      February 19th, 2009 at 11:42 am

    6. Angie says:

      I used to joke w/ my gorgeous friend that the only reason I went shopping with her was that was the only way to get guys to look at me. 🙂 She is such a beautiful soul… and that just makes her even more gorgeous, and because of that beautiful soul I know just how you feel about the lack of jealousy.

      Enjoy your birthday meal together.

      February 19th, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    7. Sarah says:

      I have one of those friends…=) I’m told hers is more of an “aura” in that she has these incredible curves and she just moves around so that men can’t help but look, they’re eyes are just drawn, it’s a biological urge over which they have no control.

      So I make sure she goes first. I’m young, still, but the only curve is my belly. And my enormous pregnant boobs of doom. And really, men don’t fall out of their chairs for those boobs when they can’t see them past my belly.

      What else is a girl to do?

      Enjoy your birthday night out!!!

      February 19th, 2009 at 1:19 pm

    8. Janet says:

      That same thing happened to me. We were at an afterwork get together at a local resturant when a friend and I went to the ladies room together. Only I hate to say that letting your friend walk in front won’t help. My friend was walking in front and I was walking behind her. We had to walk through the bar and the men were literaly falling off their bar stools trying to get a look at her. She has a great figure, and long blonde hair. But even though she is my friend I have to be the first to say that she is a total ditzy blonde. All of her friends would agree. But she’s out ditzy blonde and we love her. I just wish all those men at the bar knew that I have so much more to offer than she does! But alas, they will never know. Their loss.

      February 19th, 2009 at 2:02 pm

    9. HarryJacksMom says:

      I just taught my boys to say that to their dad when he sits down beside them, or if we can get him to go before me in any way…hehe. I have a lot of friends of different ages, and that 14 above or 14 below is about my favorite, for all the reasons you mentioned. Have a wonderful belated birthday dinner! And HB, btw 🙂

      February 19th, 2009 at 3:29 pm

    10. Baby Favorite says:

      Well, based on what I’ve seen of you, I find it hard to believe that no one was looking at YOU.

      My New Year’s Resolution was to adopt some new, less attractive friends. All of my friends are younger and cuter, and frankly, it sucks.

      February 19th, 2009 at 4:17 pm

    11. Baby Favorite says:

      (Totally kidding above. I hope everyone realizes that.)

      February 19th, 2009 at 4:20 pm

    12. shayne says:

      I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN! I’m short, dumpy AND aesthetically challenged. I also sing on stage with 4 gorgeous, thin, amazingly talented women every Sunday morning. I just received an e-mail from my Pastor today that he wants us to have a group picture taken for the Church website. *groan* Photoshop take me away!!! Literally.

      February 19th, 2009 at 4:22 pm

    13. Stretch Mark Mama says:

      Oh, you can walk beside me and I won’t mind. Men still gawk at me but it’s for faaarrrrr different reasons.

      February 19th, 2009 at 6:35 pm

    14. Roxanne says:

      Enjoy your night. Enjoy your friend. Thanks for sharing so much of yourself with us. I hope you had some cheesecake for me. 🙂

      February 19th, 2009 at 9:32 pm

    15. Brigitte says:

      I have a friend or two like that, but even though I love them, I’m STILL a self-concious dork with a spontaneous case of Tourette’s around them . . then again, I’m like that around ‘most ANYbody! 😉

      February 20th, 2009 at 6:07 am

    16. Gretchen says:

      folded your pride and put it neatly in your purse…

      much more couth than me…i’d a headed for the bar… 😉

      February 24th, 2009 at 12:43 am

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