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  • Does My Neck Look A Little Pink To You?

    April 22, 2009

    Yesterday, I was multitasking, which is always a dangerous proposition for a blonde type person like me.

    I was sitting on the sofa doing some computer work while taking turns with Sean shooting a Nerf gun at some targets he had set up in the window across the room.

    “Mom!” he said, demanding my attention. “Mom, it’s your turn!”

    He offers me the gun and the spongy bullets, but I’ve got my hands full of laptop.

    “Reload the gun for your mama, will you please,” I said.

    If you’ve ever uttered those words to your five-year-old…you might just be a redneck.

    39 Comments »

    1. Babybloomr says:

      I was born and raised in Arkansas, so I do feel somewhat qualified to comment on the subject: Yes, you just might be.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 8:21 am

    2. Margaret says:

      As a born and bred Alabamian, yes, you might be. As a mother, you probably thought you would never so those particular words to your child.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 8:30 am

    3. Liz says:

      Several minutes after reading this post I’m still chuckling….

      April 22nd, 2009 at 8:44 am

    4. Margie says:

      Born and raised in S. Louisiana and living in Arkansas, I’d say, yup, sounds like it ta me. And I second Margaret’s remark about saying that to your child. Too funny.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:26 am

    5. Iota says:

      Those nerf guns are just great.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:36 am

    6. elizabeth says:

      Very funny. This mommydom thing does make you say strange things like “Don’t squish your brother”.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:48 am

    7. MommyJ says:

      Ha! This made me laugh out loud. šŸ™‚ My husband is a homebuilder in our small, rural, VERY southern town, and spends quite a bit of time wandering the sides of mountains, scouting out potential homesites with his clients… many of whom have rifle racks attached to the backs of their pickup trucks – men and women alike. I would imagine he’s met a few mama’s that have made that very request to their children. Hunting is big around here… BIG.

      Only nerf guns for me though. šŸ˜‰

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:49 am

    8. Pam D says:

      Hee! Hmm.. this morning, I caught a tiny little mouse that the dog somehow let in. And I put it in a bug box and gave it to my son as a gift, because he’s always wanted a baby mouse. It’s now at school; they’re reading “The Cricket in Times Square” and it looks like Tucker. I’m trying to imagine my life before my son, and I cannot even remember it now.

      The big question is: who won? You or Sean?

      * * *
      Not me. I couldn’t hit the side of a barn. Sean, on the other hand, has a remarkable steady center and an amazing sense of balance. And I swear he can read the numbers off a jet plane that is flying over the house.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:53 am

    9. Melanie says:

      Yeah, that’s pretty funny.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:58 am

    10. Beverlydru says:

      Just a little pink neck. Nothing serious.
      Sounds like rednecks are not limited to a particular state… we have our share in N. Florida too. In fact, my husband’s neck is a little pink too. LOL.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:59 am

    11. Shoe says:

      My son actually checked his neck to see if it was red because he believed he was a “red neck”. He always had the red neck attitude.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 10:27 am

    12. Anne says:

      I am totally guilty of some red-neck type behavior since I have had kids too. Last summer after a rain storm my kids had a great time splashing and “swimming” in the drainage ditch in front of our house… by the road.. that cars drive by… with drivers who saw kids in soaking wet cut off shorts.

      * * *
      We did that growing up, stomping in the ditch after the rain. Barefoot. It’s amazing that we made it into adulthood. ~AM

      April 22nd, 2009 at 10:31 am

    13. zoom says:

      That is one of the funniest things I have read in a long, long time…

      April 22nd, 2009 at 10:33 am

    14. Kira says:

      I’m from rural NW Georgia and I used to be a competitive target shooter. I learned when I was 6. My uncle set up an outdoor target for us on shared family property and I once heard this gem from my elderly great-aunt: “That’s real pretty shooting, y’all, but don’t be getting no casings in my tomatoes.”

      * * *
      Ha! Sounds like something Granny Clampett would say. I love it!

      April 22nd, 2009 at 11:12 am

    15. tom says:

      If you hit the target five out of five times and sent your hound dog Luke to retrieve, THEN there is a strong possibility that you might be a redneck.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 11:49 am

    16. Michele says:

      Oh, you are too funny!

      April 22nd, 2009 at 11:59 am

    17. rrmama says:

      To funny! Yes red as my neck can get…Southeast Texas!

      April 22nd, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    18. K. Vannest says:

      Love it! My mom helped us build rubber band guns with clothes pins, declared the cat out of season (we poached a bit), and turned her head when we stalked houseflies. When the supply of insects ran low, we let some in, naturally. When found out, we learned the value of a sponge, and that hunting has a messy side. We also endured a captive lecture on the value of and respect for all living things; even rednecks. šŸ˜‰

      April 22nd, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    19. Bee says:

      You’d think I’d be in touch with my redneck side, living where I do. But I thought this was going to be a sunburn you got from wearing your hair up while playing outside with Sean.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 12:06 pm

    20. Carol says:

      This is uncanny…I actually had to tell my daughter last night to quit shooting cans with her b.b. gun out the back door and go do her homework…and she’s 16! This is from an upstate N.Y. redneck:-)

      April 22nd, 2009 at 12:19 pm

    21. Roxanne says:

      A redneck wouldn’t say please. šŸ™‚

      April 22nd, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    22. Heather says:

      So I only had to read that 3 times before I figured out the joke. It all sounded pretty normal to me šŸ™‚

      April 22nd, 2009 at 1:16 pm

    23. Just Mom says:

      BAH HAHAHAHAHAHA*snort*HAHAHAHAHAHAHA…

      April 22nd, 2009 at 1:59 pm

    24. Grace says:

      For Beverlydru: You have your share of rednecks in N. Florida? Hello! North Florida IS redneck country. At least in the Panhandle. lol After living in it for almost six years, it won a permanent, and precious, place in my heart.

      AM: I think we all have a little redneck in us, but boys definitely bring it out. Thank goodness for Nerf.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 2:33 pm

    25. Minnesotamom says:

      Or….you might be AWESOME.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 3:18 pm

    26. Kathy says:

      You say you might be a bit redneck like it’s a bad thing! (Big grin – just yanking’ your chain here.) Perhaps you’re just a bit NRA.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 3:22 pm

    27. Teri from Indiana says:

      You didn’t call him Darlin’ and you said please……I don’t think you’re redneck…a nice rose maybe. Redneck is a frame of mind. I was the only girl on our block with a Barbie with inverted nipples thanks to my older brother, his b.b. gun and a mother who thought/thinks her boys could do no wrong. I yell at him yet whenever he mentions it. I say he owes me one mint condition 1966 Barbie.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 3:57 pm

    28. Julia says:

      That’s about the funniest thing I’ve heard in a LONG time! Thanks for the chuckle!

      Julia

      April 22nd, 2009 at 4:21 pm

    29. Lisa B. says:

      Rednecks do most certainly say please but it’s more likely to be “purty please with shuga on top”.

      April 22nd, 2009 at 5:02 pm

    30. Jenni D. says:

      How about this, which I have threatened more than once: You have to finish your hot dog or you don’t get dessert!
      If you had told me ten years ago that I’d be using hot dogs as bargaining chips….

      April 22nd, 2009 at 8:20 pm

    31. Lori says:

      Now THAT’S funny!

      April 22nd, 2009 at 9:56 pm

    32. Steffj89 says:

      LOLOL yeah my redneck side has come out more since having redneck lil monsters…ummmm boys….and btw our older 5 y/o can by far outshoot me…w/ a .22 last fall, he got 8 of 10 targets, i only hit 4-5
      steff

      April 22nd, 2009 at 11:33 pm

    33. Brigitte says:

      Too funny! It’s great to get a good chuckle before it’s even 6:00 am yet.

      April 23rd, 2009 at 5:40 am

    34. Luke Holzmann says:

      A redneck… or a mother of a boy [smile].

      ~Luke

      April 23rd, 2009 at 9:08 am

    35. Jenny-Jenny says:

      Reload the gun and give me some shuga, darlin’. Sounds like you should be cookin’ up somethin’ in butta’ with Paula Deen.

      April 23rd, 2009 at 12:30 pm

    36. Ann G says:

      Sounds like a momma to me!! Multi-tasking while trying to do her ‘thang’ and the little person’s ‘thang’….It’s the way of the momma!

      April 23rd, 2009 at 6:23 pm

    37. deb says:

      Yeah, sounds like the activities in our house when my boys were small. Then they grew up…and one day in his college dormroom my rednecked eldest, with his laptop in his lap, casually wondered if his nerf gun would successfully shoot a pen cap.

      It did.

      And forever after he had a nice black dolphin-shaped spot embedded on his laptop screen to prove it.

      April 23rd, 2009 at 8:25 pm

    38. owlhaven says:

      Too funny!

      Mary

      April 24th, 2009 at 11:49 pm

    39. celita says:

      Hah, hah, hah… Got a nice sized giggle out of that one. Thank you.

      May 6th, 2009 at 10:03 am

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