Always Real

One Thousand Memories

I started writing this blog in July of 2005. In that time, I’ve published over 1,000 stories about my life as an older mother of a little boy.  And I’ve got another 1,000 stories that I have sketched out in notes but have never gotten around to writing and yet another 1,000 stories that were never written because I thought, in that moment, that I would jot down a note about it as soon as I could find a pen and I would write about it later.  But in the distraction of life I never found the pen, never wrote the note and I simply forgot about it.

Or worse, it’s not entirely forgotten, just mostly forgotten.

Often at the end of the day as I burrow into my pillow waiting for sleep to take me away, I want to turn to my husband and tell him about some remarkable thing that Sean said or did that day.  A small, sticky, persistent gnat of a memory buzzes around the dark perimeter of my brain, taunting and annoying me.  It won’t be shooed away and it won’t light long enough to show itself.  All I know is that something happened that day that I want to share, but I just can’t quite reconstitute the memory.

So I turn to AD and I tell him, “Sean said the funniest thing today.”

And he says, “Really? What? Tell me.”

And I say, “I have no idea. But it was really funny.”

23 thoughts on “One Thousand Memories

  1. Oh I am so there! Just this minute I was trying to remember something funny I wanted to tell my husband, & it was just gone. But it was funny!

    This is ironic – I was just scrolling through my google reader looking at the blogs of people who hadn’t posted in a while & I opened yours & sighed. Good to see you!

  2. *snort* This is a daily occurrence in our home. I wish I could carry a notepad around to record the things that happen, funny things said. By the time 5:45 rolls around, my brain is usually mush and I can’t remember a lick of it. 🙂

  3. This is when I text myself or call the home phone to leave myself a message…because I know I won’t remember it by the time I turn around.

    You are not alone.

  4. That’s exactly why I started a blog…all those memories that are sharp in the moment and fade. I’m just glad you started one – it’s been a true joy to read your words and see your pix and get to know a little slice of Texas – thank you!

  5. We should invent brain-gnat spray and get rich. Heh. Two formulas — one for forgetting and one for remembering.

  6. I know exactly what you mean. EXACTLY.
    And now that I write far less about my kids, and far less often, it’s like whole months of time have barely happened in my memories. DE-pressing.

  7. Another “me too” chiming in. More recently I’ve been thinking I should follow Michael around with a tape recorder, as he’s been spitting out more verbal incongruities than ever, and even seconds after he’s done I’ve forgotten most of what he’s said.

    BTW – glad you’re back!

    * * * *
    Oh you should – that would be a treasure to have his voice recorded. For some reason I had a voice recording of Sean from when he was about 3 that I didn’t realize had ended up on my iPod. I had apparently recorded it one of those times when we were in the car where I turned it on without him knowing and just recorded his jabbering. His voice was so sweet and he was so funny. When it came on the iPod, I wasn’t expecting it and it startled me – because I realized that I had forgotten what he sounded like at three.

  8. And it doesn’t end when they are little – that wanting to share details.

    Last night I turned to my husband in bed and said “make a note. We need to discuss KaylaBeth’s schedule for the next month….” She has plans to go to 3 church lock ins, homecoming dances, etc. and the best I can tell her at 3 in the afternoon is “Daddy and I need to discuss it….” We have raised a social butterfly. When I win the lottery I’m going to hire her an assistant so I can catch my breath.

  9. PLEASE write those other 1,000 stories! I have loved every one of your entries and they always make me laugh or cry or thank the lord that I am not the only one has had endured the same adventures in parenting! I love your style and miss you terribly!

  10. Does Sean worry about you being older? Gabe is semi-obsessed with our impending demise. Just last night he was actually crying over the thought of losing his Mommy & Daddy. I do everything in my power to ease his worries; neither of us is even ill. I tell him that we have every intention of hanging around to see who his beautiful wife will be, and meeting his red-headed children. I was just wondering if this is common among children of older parents.

  11. Oh please….I do hope you take the time to write down those 1,000 stories! Each new blog you write brings a smile – do it for Sean, for yourself, your readers and also for your Mom!

    Marviv

  12. I’m glad you’re still writing… We have had such an action-packed summer that I haven’t written much either!

    Good luck at school Sean! You’re going to ROCK!

  13. When my kids were younger, I did that all that time. And now I’ve forgotten. And it’s such a bummer, because I really did have the funniest kids! I can relate.

  14. I quite often turn to my husband and say “what was that cute thing that x said today?” and he looks at me, and replies “I’ve not been here today, so I don’t know”.

    If I can’t even remember who’s been in the house, it’s not surprising I can’t remember all the cute things. (But the ones I do remember, I write down.)

  15. Sometimes I watch my little one playing and doing his thing and try to memorize every little face and cute act. But I know that I’ll forget 90% of it all and it makes me so sad.

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