Antique Daddy, Sometimes Tart

Car Talk

There is an on-going discussion at our house and it goes like this: The Car — Sacred Machine or Roving Diner? One parent believes the car is a sacred moving metal sculpture and should be revered as a mechanical temple. Into “the car” (whispered) no food nor drink shall ever pass. No Goldfish, no crackers, certainly no French fries, no nuggets, no Mcfood of any kind. The wheels of such shall never come to rest upon the unholy ground of Sonic. Verily. Those seeking to enter into the inner sanctum of “the car” must first repent…

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Parenting Gone Awry, Snips And Snails, Sometimes Sweet

It’s not the gift, but the balloon that counts.

Last year, when Sean turned one, I went all out and threw him a big party — or rather I threw a party for all those who had been with us through the pregnancy and that crazy first year. For that, those people deserve a party and a place in heaven. And is there any better way to show your appreciation than to serve cake with icing that turns your teeth blue? I think not. It’s kind of too bad that Sean won’t remember that on his first birthday the house was filled with people (with…

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Makes Me Sigh, Sometimes Sweet

Just Two Wonderful!

Dear Sean – You are two years old today — two years! You are no longer a baby, but a little boy. While Daddy and I celebrate the amazing creature that you have become and the hope of what the future holds for you, we selfishly grieve the irretrievable days that have already slipped away. Not a day passes that I don’t want to go back and do it all over again, even the day Mommy set you and the lamp you busted out on the curb in a big box addressed to Grandma. I never…

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Antique Crazy, Antique Friends

Part-Time Pet

My neighbor thinks I am trying to take over his cat. And it’s partly true. I’m not trying to take it over completely. It’s not like I want the responsibility of vet bills, flea collars and a litter box. I just want to have a fling with his cat. I just want some “no strings attached” pet affection. I just want an opportunity for my son to learn that cats do not normally kill little boys. That’s all. And if lovin’ this cat is wrong, then I don’t wanna be right. Photo Temporarily Unavailable The neighbor…

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GiGi and Poopah, Makes Me Sigh, Snips And Snails

The Hair Cut

After the 7th or 8th time someone referred to my little boy as “she” this past week, I caved in and made an appointment to have his beautiful golden curls whacked off. This event, more than any other, has made me grieve the passing of his babyhood. All of the previous mile markers were victories, and really with his DNA, growing hair is a victory, albeit probably short lived. But in spite of all that, this cutting of his baby curls just seemed to be a passing of a point of no return. And I didn’t…

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Mildly Amusing, Use Your Words

Man of Many Words

As Sean approaches his second birthday, his language skills are really coming along. At the rate of about 100 words a day. And anything worth saying is worth saying 100 times. In a row. On a recent trip to the grocery store, Sean made the connection between the word “MEAT!” (all caps because a word such as that must be exclaimed with all due vigor) and cellophane clad chicken. He scrambled up a freezer case of chicken, peered inside and started pointing and hollering at the top of his lungs “MEAT! MEAT!” Only instead of just…

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Antique Daddy, Makes Me Sigh, Mildly Amusing


Sean will be two years old next month and he has accomplished many things in that short time. But growing a full head of hair is not one of them. Sean is descended from a long line of hair challenged men. His father’s face is so remarkably handsome, hair would only be a distraction. Both of Sean’s grandfathers, and even those before them, sported beautifully bald pates, as do all the uncles on both sides. Sean does not stand a chance of being a rock star as it is likely that he will be able to…

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Mildly Amusing

The Neat Freak Gene

When Sean was first born, some people wondered if I was really his mother. He looked nothing like me. When his 85-year-old great aunt first laid eyes on him in the NICU she declared that she could have picked him out as Antique Daddy’s boy out of 1,000 babies. And she was right. They were both bald and had prominent chins. These days the boy looks more like me – uncooperative hair and usually wearing food. No matter whom he currently resembles, the quirky things he does that his quirky antique parents both do, makes him…

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Makes Me Sigh, Snips And Snails, Sometimes Sweet

Leg Hugs

A year ago, just as Sean was learning to walk, he was my lover boy. He always had love for Mommy — precious sweet toddler affection, which expressed itself in many forms, but always with slobber. I never dreamed how much I would appreciate someone standing in my lap and sucking on my nose. Or slobbering a slimy river of drool into my ear while chanting in baby baritone “mahmahmahmahmah.” Until one day, it happened no more. The more Sean perfected walking, the more independent he became and the less affection he had for me. Unlike…

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Antique Daddy, Makes Me Sigh

Accept No Substitutes

Like most modern households with children, we have divvied up the child-care tasks. Antique Daddy handles the bedtime routine and I handle everything else up to that point. And I must say that he does an excellent job. With very few exceptions, bedtime is a happy and special time that both he and Sean look forward to at the end of the day. Antique Daddy was gone a few days this week, so I had to cover the bedtime routine. And I really thought it went well. Sean happily went to sleep each night. I thought…

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